Obsession

At DVerse, we are using brand names in our poetry. Join in here! I used the list of perfumes for inspiration.


Obsession

I just want to be

Beautiful.

It takes a long time

To realize the allure

Is not worth the

Obsession,

The weight weight

Weight of my sin

Is much more than

Whatever fat I wish

To lift from my

White shoulders,

Negativity waits in

Ambush, as a

Midnight poison

Keeping me awake,

Keeping me in chains

As addictive as opium —

I just want to feel

Beautuful.”

 

 

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Warmth

This week’s haibun Monday is about compassion, but we are to write about it without explicitly stating it.


Many people suffered with me willingly, giving positivity, thoughts, prayers, being there for late-night phone calls and parked-car conversations. They modeled true friendship, which I can never forget. They saved my life in body, and even more in mind and spirit.

Winter’s frost is thawed.
Friends are the warm cup of tea,
Comfort like blankets.

Ridiculous Tragedy

Over at Real Toads, Frida Kahlo, her quotes, photos, and paintings, are our inspiration today. I used the following quotation: “Nothing is worth more than laughter. It is strength to laugh and to abandon oneself, to be light. Tragedy is the most ridiculous thing.” – Frida Kahlo


When I entered recovery,
I knew it was serious when
Someone told me,
“You could be a model if you gained weight.”

And –even she thought this was funny —
The doctor I saw,
Her name was Barbie
(And yes, her husband was Ken).

I still have to laugh years later
Otherwise I’d go crazy ( -er ) —
My brothers like to play this computer game
Don’t Starve, and when I see that
I want to say,
“I play that game every day.”

Astonished

via Daily Prompt: Astonish

Inspired by the fact that I am sick today, which led to the realization that my body is fighting for me, even when I  criticize it. For the last day of NaPoWriMo.


I’m always astonished

By the body’s capacity

To keep on going,

Its defense system inside,

Its wise decisions

Of which I’m not conscious.

I should relax, rest,

Stop trying to control and test

Everything, but trust it:

My body loves me.

Five Milestones

Today at Real Toads we are writing list poems consisting of 5 items. This is a little bit of an autobiography.


The fourth of July,

Date of my independence

From the NICU

After two

Weeks.

 

March seventeenth,

The day I decided

To let God drive

The snakes out of my life:

I was becoming

Too weak.

 

April twentieth,

Easter Sunday,

Coming home,

Beginning

A new life.

 

July twenty-seventh,

In the summer heat

Dying and rising again

In the waters

Of baptism.

 

The fourth of June,

The happiest afternoon

When I began anew,

With even more courage

Filled, rebuilt.

Push

I almost forgot to post something for NaPoWriMo day 21. Out of several poems written today, none of them seem good enough to share, but here is one. I guess this can fit with part of today’s prompt on the NaPoWriMo web site, as it “comments on comments on the narcissism of our time, i.e. beauty and body obsession, etc.” Obviously, eating disorders and exercise addiction are not rooted in narcissism, but it still fits the topic well enough.


Push:
Limits
Don’t exist,
Loving the burn.
Endorphins mitigate anxiety,
But exercise can become addicting.
Not minding risk,
Collapsing
Tiring
Faint.

Form: Double Tetractys
Syllables : 1/2/3/4/10/10/4/3/2/1
Rhyme optional

White Lilies

This is for Frank J. Tassone’s haikai challenge for this week, which is about white lilies or azaleas. I loved this prompt and wrote many haiku but not one that I wanted to share, so here, finally, is a tanka. Frank describes the meaning of these flowers in his blog post, and part of what gave me inspiration was this: “Gifting white lilies to someone during this time indicates that you are very happy to be acquainted with the recipient.”


You are pure beauty
And you were made perfectly,
White-lily woman.
You hid your petals before.
I am pleased to meet you now.