This is a re-post of a ghazal that I wrote a couple of years ago. I am sharing with DVerse for this month’s poetry form.
“Call Me Hagar”
I decided to write another ghazal today. I normally wouldn’t post twice in one day but was very happy with how this turned out! It was inspired by Agha Shahid Ali’s poem “Tonight”. I am not feeling this way currently but am very familiar with the struggles described in the following poem.
I feel alone, connection’s far tonight,
I see no smiling star tonight.
Even the moon has forgotten its light.
Shrouded, it makes the sky dark as tar tonight.
My mind sees a battlefield near:
What emotions will I need to spar tonight?
Depression, restlessness, fear, anxiety?
What demons come to wound and scar tonight?
Yet hope alone, even now, can fight
The darkness; complete despair I’ll bar tonight.
And in the midst of these anxieties God sees:
I sob in God’s arms. Call me Hagar tonight.
revivedwriter 
I like that turn from darkness and despair to one of comfort in God’s arms. Love that ending couplet.
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A woman in bondage, for her I think life is a battlefield. For Hagar too..to live in a man’s house and be instructed to take orders from his wife. How much faith one must have to hold on under those circumstances. This is the tale of wrong doing and the pain love can give. It is brilliant!
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Reblogged this on Reena Saxena and commented:
A ghazal in English, which comes closest to the Urdu form —- by arevivedwriter
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This is very moving, and technically skilled, too.
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I’m glad you like it.
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Good one, Mary. Go straight to the top of the class for getting the rhymes in 🙂
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To find the relief in God in the end is a great resolution for the darkness in of the night.
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AH, I love how you took Shahid’s “tonight” refrain and made it yours — it’s such an emotional verse with its darkness palpable in every couplet. Beautifully done! 🙂
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Thank you!!
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You captured the emotional turmoil experienced during our darkest hours…your ghazal flowed so naturally, excellent!
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I think this is wonderful! (In fact I like it much better than Shahid’s, which seems to me convoluted, with all those quotations.)
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Oh wow, thanks!
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Love the Biblical reference
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I really like your identification with Hagar.,, lost and abandon and alone in the desert with her son!
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I liked this very much. The comparison to Hagar leaves an acute impression. The handling of the form is excellent.
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Dawn will come even after dark nights of the soul. This is a touching depiction of the pain and the found peace.
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Re-reading (via your share at Poets United) I love it all over again. 🙂
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Even the moon forgets its light is my favorite line.
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yeah, I’m with Colleen on the forgetful moon line.
Very well crafted, too; ghazal’s one of my fave forms. I had a prize-winner published earlier this year. If you’re interested, you can read it here: https://eggsovertokyo.blogspot.com/2020/05/separate-ways-ghazal.html
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“Call me Hagar tonight” — harkens to “call me Ishmael” — and all the undercurrents of that story add to this deeply powerful and stirring poem of faith. Beautiful.
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Thank you! I’m glad you got the allusion.
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My pleasure, it’s lovely.
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I didn’t comment on this when I first read it. It is so deep. I love the form, but I felt that I too was with you sobbing in God’s arms. I am crying now as I read it again. The Dark Night. And Hagar in her abandonment. So deeply moving. What a good job we have God’s arms to sob in. ❤️
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Really good depiction of total surrender
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Oh my goodness, this is not just BEAUTIFUL and heartfelt, it is a word from the Lord for me today, so I thank you truly! I’d not thought much about Hagar, though I consider myself fairly well-read in the Bible–I love God’s Word and read it faithfully; but now I want to go back and read her story with your poem in mind. May you be abundantly blessed in the coming weeks, God is SO Faithful ❤
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That is wonderful to hear that it helped you. ❤
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I’m actually the same blogger as Jael Stevens (2 blogs, though one will probably be deleted in future)–so you’re getting a double thanks for this blessing you brought to me! And I’ll be following you<3
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Reblogged this on Guarded Heart Tapestry and commented:
This is the most beautiful poem I’ve read this month!!
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I like the musicality in this and I am particularly drawn to the opening.
I feel alone, connection’s far tonight,
I see no smiling star tonight.
Even the moon has forgotten its light.
Shrouded, it makes the sky dark as tar tonight.
Well done.
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I hate when the stars don’t smile and the moon forgets its own light!
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You did a beautiful job with the Biblical comparison to Hagar! Al the anguish and pain and total dependence on God. Well done.
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“And in the midst of these anxieties God sees:
I sob in God’s arms. Call me Hagar tonight.”
I can relate to this so much…we all have nights like this.
Beautiful poem ❤
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“Even the moon has forgotten its light.”…i love this
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This is a wonderful emotional piece. Very well written.
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I love this. So many emotions going on. Bringing Hagar in like you did works beautifully. Well done with the rhyming .
gramswisewords.blogspot.com
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A wonderful ghazal, so many beautiful and poignant couplets.
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Great title. Gave me identity for the poem. Well done.
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I just found this again and it struck me because lately I seem to relate to it more than ever. Absolutely love it. Powerful words
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“Thou, God, seest me.” Great comfort for a dark night. Love this!
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