Ouch

M-R-S degree:
Not life’s entire attainment
But I can’t help it —
Want someone to share my life,
Someone to accept my love

This tanka was inspired by the wordle below from MLMM. The word “marriage” specifically led to me writing this. The point of a wordle is to use most / all of the words, but I’m still linking up.

A couple of months ago, my bf and I of 15 months broke up, since his mother decided that she didn’t like me, for the sole reason that I have an entry-level job. It has been a really hard process, especially because my ex hardly even stood up and fought for me, even though he was crazy about me and all but proposed. Everyone I’ve spoken to says that A. his mother was way out of line, and B. I deserve better. Sometimes I believe that. In fact, I believed it more in the beginning, to be honest. I even got angry with my now-ex and told him to “grow some balls” — and I usually don’t use that kind of language, especially not to someone’s face!

Today it still hurts so much to be judged in such a way. It has been especially difficult because even if I “deserve better,” where can I find “better;” I don’t know?

3 thoughts on “Ouch

  1. That’s a lovely tanka. The yearning is clear, and not unreasonable. I am sorry your ex didn’t stand up to his mother. You ARE better off, although it hurts. Mama’s boys don’t change. Even if you have a so called entry-level job your entire life, so what? You were right to ask him about the balls! Maybe the out of character speak will jolt him into understanding where he went wrong. Not your problem anymore. You WILL meet someone worthy of you, who will be happy to add that M.R.S. degree to your name! Stop saying “IF” you deserve better! Of course you do! She’s probably one of those mothers who think no one is good enough for her baby boy. You were good enough for him, he wasn’t good enough for you! (Coming from someone married for nearly 30 years before death parted us.)

    Liked by 1 person

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